Just saying…I’m acutely aware of how my days go. How sometimes I feel I’m hanging onto the pendulum of a giant grandfather clock. Travelling its trajectory, back and forth. And the place I love the best is where I find myself this morning. In between. Suspended. There’s a word for this I think. Stasis? Except I just googled stasis–and CAN NOT believe the definition.
sta·sis
noun
1. a period or state of inactivity or equilibrium.
2. civil strife.
Really? Definition 1: a period of … equilibrium. But definition 2…civil strife? Seemingly polar opposites. And considering this, how actually it really does make sense. That wrapped up in any given moment is the potential for all things, all extremes, all possibilities. Equilibrium/strife. Ease/disease. Joy/sorrow. On and off. And the biggie–for me–preference/aversion. And as I rest here at the bottom of the arc between pendulum swings, it’s again clear that preferring one state over the other actually denies half of the whole of the human experience. Does this make any sense?
And on some other level, the fact that I prefer, lets say, one basket over another–this one
over this one:
really might be an unnecessary comparison. Meaningless on some basic level. And again the reminder that I do not need to polarize. To judge. To discriminate. Because really, rather than a matter of this or that maybe it’s simply just BOTH.
following thread 
There are times when preference over one state is necessary, even if for a short while. In general terms, I am always going to be drawn to green baskets over purple or blue. In life terms while I understand that balance comes from acknowledging and accepting opposites, at times, when sorrow and worry enter,my inclination is to prefer the opposite. I say this as I reside in a limbo space, waiting for news of my sister’s passing yet not wanting to acknowledge this news. Yet I know instinctively and realistically that wishful thinking does not control or alter what will be.
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yes, i think/guess it’s only natural that we prefer certain states–states w/o hard edges or discomfort. but i have a sense of something here that i’m trying to get at. and i think it has to do with maintaining that deep, grounded centered place within–regardless of externals. anyway, thanks for helping me clarify this. sending you love as you await your news
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prefer. this is very much on my mind. How everything just is, whether we prefer it or not
and the preferring is just our own uhhh….delusion. It’s like whether i am preferring
New Mexico or Detroit. Both would welcome me.
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i like that. the idea that preferring is a delusion. there is more here that i want to process. and i thank you, grace and marti, for showing up.
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ah well you never know what’s around the corner… I would have preferred for the sun to stay out yesterday and not have the hail block the gutters to make a new internal waterfall where one has never shown up before right over our bed, we had to crash on the floor in the lounge room with the electric heater on all night drying out the bedding but that’s what happened and we did it and it’s 3 am on a brand new day, thank goodness for sunset and sunrise!
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ah. i learn from you.
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